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Cases 1- 4
1. Cursing, swearing, taking the Lord's name in vain for any and everything; it grows tiresome and stressful very quickly. Every one find themselves in the occasional situation where the King's English will not suffice and a colorful expletive is the only way to deliver the moment in true color (HD), but when a woman who is candidate for your long term affections cannot command the mental discipline to restrain from practicing free flowing foul language, then one has to give serious consideration to whether that woman is suited to consider for a life partner. The funny thing about this is, that it is probably a measure of the double standard,on the part of the man, who may himself swear verbosely; but in his defense, he is attempting to better himself by association, with someone of a higher standard than himself; his wife. He doesn't just choose you (his woman )to suit himself, but he also needs to get the approval of those whom he holds in highest esteem and around whom he expects his life to rotate. He cannot afford to be constantly threatened by the possibility of embarrassment, because you are not in control of your tongue. Most of the time, swearing is unnecessary and probably just a result of mental laziness; refusal to employ cognitive, linguistic discipline in forming ideas, and the patience to express them in a civil manner that it is not offensive to the public at large. Pick up a dictionary and teach yourself a few new words per day/week, whatever.
2. Don't act like or pretend to be one of 'the Boys' just to be liked; it makes you look like a people-pleaser who will do anything to make a situation work, especially when something is offensive to you as a person or as a self respecting female. When go out with a new man he is looking for you to chart a pattern of behavior that will govern his actions, if you start to act like you don't respect yourself or what's important to you, he will quickly endorse that and act accordingly. Therefore, it is imperative that you set a standard of behavior for yourself before you go out with him or any man, and stick to your guns. If he is looking for a fling he will not have the patience to live up to your expectations, that's OK, let him go his way. I am not talking about setting unrealistic and ureasonable standards that you, yourself cannot live up to in the long run, I am talking about a list of requirements that you have designed for yourself after concious introspection and soul searching of self: that demand to be met for happiness to be achieved.
3. Do not show up for your first date unprepared. Always have an agenda: Know what you want to do on your date, it is OK to let the man choose the place as long as you are OK with the choice. Surprises are OK if you have stated your preferences: don't let him take you to a movie if you recommended a quiet place to talk and he circumvents your request. If you want to talk, interview or interrogate your date, the movie is not a good place to execute that exercise. Men are well aware that the movies and or Club is not the place to conduct a serious talk, so to avoid the talk they will always try to find a distracting environment to assist them in diverting attention from their agenda, if they have one. Some men are just not good communicators so they try to navigate around the full, frontal face-off by avoiding situations that promise to engage them in honest, open conversation. Their goal is avoid disclosure in any, way for as long as they can. The man who is in a hurry to get on with his plan will always employ diversion and once you fall for the first play he will never digress. Don't let him. Grab your purse and call a cab. Set a precedence or get ready for the same old BS.
4. Do not afford yourself the most expensive item on the menu at dinner, on your first date. (This is test.) Even if he can afford it, don't overdo it. I am not going to be feed you that old cliche about being classy, if you are classy you will know instinctively what to do, but as a rule, he is hoping that you will play your true hand here. If you are 'hungry' he will feed you to your indulgence to get what he wants; which may fit right into your agenda. If that's what you are about then eat and be merry. On the other hand if you are looking for 'The Man'; The One', then the meal is not the key, it just affords you the oppotunity to role play while you investigate this individual and pre-qualify or qualify him. This is a test; hint, it is not about dinner, don't compromise yourself, this is about opportunity. The 'Real Man' is hoping you will make it about him, not just his wallet. Make it about him: Good or Bad. Don't waste a good oppotunity being sidetracked with expensive 'Bait', interview the 'Dude', get the answers you need, You can grab a Big Mac on the way home without have to feel as if you were 'Paid-For'.
To be continued in the next submission
Michael Eric Markland
Author Of: Why The Hell Can't I Find A Good Man? (From A Man's Point Of View)Pick up a copy AT
http://michaelericmarkland.com/preorder.htm or http://www.amazon.com/Why-Hell-Cant-Find-Good/dp/1439250995/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1254840220&sr=1-1
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